Misuse of the word fate

Whilst I sit here eating my Fruit Loops (yes I eat fruit loops for breakfast) I feel I have to talk about a topic that has been niggling me for some time now. Fate.

The idea of fate is a beautiful thing. The belief that there is something in this world that is guiding us to the right place, and challenging us, can be as inspirational as feeling close to god or being in Love. It can also be a pile of crap that you tell yourself so that you don’t have to take responsibility for your own worthless decisions… (do you see what I did there 🙂

I know, I know. This sounds a bit harsh. The truth of the matter is, I believe that we need to let go at times and let ‘fate’ take over. In fact, I believe that it is one of the most powerful things you can do. Yet, this does not mean that you get to turn on autopilot, screw up the lives of those around you, make pathetic decisions that you take NO responsibility for, and then call it divine intervention. That’s just plain lazy.

Now, before I go too far off the beaten track, lets make this more relevant to yourself. Fate is a great thing when you are in a good place. And this is how it works… Once you have cleared a lot of your wounding’s in life and you realise that you have a positive foresight, letting go can be wonderful. Essentially, your subconscious (which is now looking for positive changes and directions) takes over and guides you down some beautiful places. This also works if you are not in a good place, your subconscious will try to find a back door, or possibly more trouble for you to get into. When you need a change in life, that is exactly what happens when you throw your life to fate. Why? Because you drop your insecurities, open yourself up to the world and walk whatever direction comes before you.

Did you ever watch the movie ‘Yes Man?’ (and yes, I am aware that there is a book, thanks for the notification mister sophisticated). Well it’s the same idea, you stop your mind from saying no to paths that are dangerous or unknown, and you become more open to new possibilities.

But here is the catch. These possibilities become your so called destiny. You put fate on these ideas and use them to justify any mistakes (or any hurt) you cause to others. Why? Because ‘you are just walking the path’. And this is where I have to say that many people are full of s&%t. Fate is the opportunity to walk through a door, not the excuse to walk through it. Have you ever thought to ask the question ‘maybe this is a test by my fate to see if I am wise enough to make the right decision?’ Or is that too much responsibility for you?

I remember 1 night in India where I felt a pull to jump on a persons scooter as they were wild and free. And needed something interesting to happen in my life urgently, and surly this was a message from above. In the end, I chose not to follow this man. Why? Because there were 5 beer cans in front of him. Now, my heart said follow as this will be a hell of a story, but instead I chose common sense. And how did this story end. I made my way across to the next venue, opened myself to fate, ended up performing a gig on stage, jumping on someone else’s scooter, having an interesting talk about morals to a hit man, and then doing another gig whilst getting free grog for the rest of my night…

I tell you the above story because I didn’t just run blindly to the first option and label it as fate. I analized the situation and chose a different path of fate. At times it’s hard to to know when to choose and when to let go, yet this is learning, and this is evolution.

Now, before you state that you are all about fate and flow with the wind, let me tell you what I often see. People such as this are actually not following fate at all. At times, when it pleases them they choose an option (which they label as fate) that limits their responsibilities. But, and this is the interesting part, when fate throws them responsibilities and hard choices, suddenly they are not interested in going with the flow anymore. They become very selective about their so called fate and choose a path (which once again, they delude themselves in believing it’s fate) which is away from the drama and responsibility in the present.

In many cases the person doing this doesn’t even know that they are doing it. Why? Because this is your mind which is in control, and your mind will do anything to avoid pain and go towards pleasure.

Before my Fruit Loops get too cold I have to tell you why I am writing this. The first is because of a lady that I know very personally. She is very religious and her life belongs to fate. For this reason, her life belongs to others. See, when you open your life to fate you are actually opening yourself up for others to make decisions for you. Depending on your company, this can either be a positive or negative thing. This sucks in this woman’s life because it’s the hardest decisions that she leaves up to fate. And eventually, inevitably, it just passes that responsibility to someone else to make the decision for her.

The other reason I am discussing this is because I can’t stand people using the excuse of fate when it comes to decisions that they don’t want to face. It is not fate, it is just you running away from your responsibility! Fate can be twisted in so many ways to make us feel that life is out of our control, or that we are guided by the divine. If that makes it easier for you to sleep at night then good on you, but don’t expect me or anyone else to be in the wake of your aftermath.

If you are going to let fate make the decisions in your life then please do me one favor, own it. If you choose not to take control of your own life and let fate point you in a direction, this is as much of a responsibility as HAVING responsibility. It is not a get out of jail free card, you can’t neglect a problem and say that ‘fate made my decision for me’. Neglect is also a decision, and it’s the weakest decision you can make out of all of them.

Life can suck at times, but we can’t just run away. I am not saying don’t believe in fate, just be aware that your perception controls your fate, and it may just be a scapegoat. I will also take this time to say that I believe in Fruit Loops. Why? because at the supermarket I let fate decide between a healthy cereal and this bowl of sugar. I now take no responsibility for what this sugar will do to my body as it was divine intervention. Thanksimages

Flesh and Blood

I made a promise to myself to never vent on this blog, whoops. But please, if you find the below confronting don’t take it as a rant, look inward. Does the below ring any bells?

Over the past couple of years I have been slowly heading into the hippy scene. There are many things that are beautiful in this area of life including self love, though there are rocky parts as well. One of the most common problems (and most REAL hippies would agree with me on this) with these types of people are that they are so deep in their own workings that they don’t realise how self centered and egotistical they have become. The greatest comment being ‘I have no ego’ which usually holds a title of ‘I am better than others’ or ‘this is the true path to life and I know it!’

I am not going to get into an argument with self denial hippies about my above statements, as in 10 years time you might finally look at yourself and go ‘WOW, I was a wanker!’ But until then, talking to you at the current moment is more like talking to a brick wall. Yet I haven’t even gotten to the topic I want to discuss yet.

Often I will see people doing Facebook posts about gay rights, immigration issues, politics, helping others and so forth. Many people are always pushing their issues online and venting their frustrations with the world. Yet the kink in this chain is the fact that when it comes to dealing with a fellow human (flesh and blood), they are nothing but obnoxious, arrogant self centered pricks. It appears great to throw out messages to the world about peace and prosperity, though unfortunately, for most, this is just an egoic reaction in regards to dealing with your own S*%t.

What is the point of Facebooking your so called noble causes whilst you treat your neighbor, friend or lover like a piece of meat? Think about it… You don’t have control over the government, nor the immigration issue, yet right before you is flesh and blood! People that need to be treated with respect and kindness. They need your ability to not cheat, not be so self involved, to not disrespect them. They need you to be honest and to get out of your egoic mind of ‘This is my life and it’s all about me’ for two seconds, and respect them.

True change does not come through delusions of grandeur in changing the world. It comes from making a difference with the people around you. Changing their lives for the better, helping them out. It can be a homeless person on the street that you have never given money to because of ‘Your story’ about why they are there. Have you stopped and talked with them? Have I?

So before you own your personal crusade of saving the world and talking crap to others (trying to justify your existence) please look at yourself in the mirror. Or better yet, look at the person next to you. Look at the people that are kind to you. Look at the people that are true flesh and blood and ask them if they are okay. Look at your decisions in life and don’t glaze over the naughty parts with justifications. OWN IT!!! This is true change, this is true affect, and this is your truth.


The Student and the Teacher

I have walked this Earth for some time now and have always considered myself a student. Of cause, I will never want this to change. Even the greatest of teachers will state that constant learning and self development is not something that should ever be lost, even in the greatest of minds. Yet if this is the case, what is the difference between the student and the teacher?

The student will often make the mistake of looking towards the future, or seeing that he/she is not up to the level that they need to be. This of cause leaves the student open to pain and disappointment because they have linked an emotion and a focus towards the future, and set themselves up for failure if they don’t meet their own standards.

A true teacher accepts the path they are on and the reality which is the present moment. They know that the present is destined as it has already occurred. The past has to be accepted and the present has to be embraced in pure love.

Acceptance is an important step we must all take. Self doubt, worry and fear often do not belong in the present. By accepting that where you are right now is meant to be you can then relax and ask the universe what message you are supposed to be receiving. I personally believe that it is ourselves that gives us that meaning, yet we will never find it if we don’t first accept where we are now.

A true teacher gives of himself/herself without thought of receiving anything back. Their ego is not affected if their information is received well or not. They accept whatever consequence comes their way and ask the question ‘why is it so?’ They do this without judgement on whether something is good or bad, for we do not know the future. Even the worst things that happen in our life can lead to a beautiful place, it just has not occurred yet. In short, a teacher simply is…



Sometimes I wonder if born again Christians went through a similar line of transformation as Eckhart Tolle’s Awakening. By the way, does anyone else think that Eckhart looks a little weird? He’s kinda cute, like part of his face never matured… Anyway…. The dedication of born again Christians often borderlines on outright obsession. They found something. It was like they walked around aimlessly for their entire lives and then suddenly WACK!!! Clarity…

I ponder on this because I had an awakening. It slapped me in the face like a cold fish and since, life has never looked the same. This, in 99% of ways has been a positive experience. My eyes opened to… Reality! And now many of the things that have occurred over the past 5 to 25 years have all made sense.

I have always been a follower of western psychology, yet clashing it hard against the Eastern beliefs made everything… Polar 🙂 It brought me to the middle. A place of peace, contemplation, contentment, and rational thought. I understood friends that I had never clicked with before, and I distanced myself from friends that I realised were… well… lets just say they were not for me.

This ‘journey’ (if you will) not only delve me into my deepest woundings, though it also directed me to India. It put an immediate stop to my egoic obsession with musical performance and brought self-love to to an empty yearning that was within me.

I, like 99.9999999 percent of us do not have all the answers and probably never will. But I can ponder and discuss the mysteries of self development and inner peace in abundance. But most of all, I can examine the great and worldly question of ‘The Meaning of Life’ Continue reading “Transformation”


Calling the title of my first ever blog ‘Me’ is a bit of a conundrum. After having a mass awakening earlier this year (2015), the first step in my process of self-love was to arrive at a non-duality work shop. I was really excited at this time as I had just begun a new journey of self exploration. But of cause, the first thing they tell you at a non-duality workshop is that the use of the word ‘I’ followed by the word ‘journey’ is incorrect. Due to the excitement of my new found ‘journey’ this was freaking frustration 🙂

They taught me that it was only ‘one without a second’ and the word ‘journey’ implies that you have to reach somewhere else rather than just be in the present moment. Now I have to admit that this did make sense, yet although I agreed and greatly respect what the teachings had to offer, I was not yet willing to walk down this line of thought. There was a lot to learn in Eastern Methodology, and this was only the first ‘concept’ (and I am sure they would love me calling it this) that I had opened my mind to.

But wait! Stop! I have already gone too far. I can’t start talking about the concept of ‘me’ or ‘The Meaning of Life’ until we delve much deeper. Let’s start at the beginning… Which fondly enough is at the end… Well…. It will all make sense eventually…